On the Death of a Mentor

Jamie Howison Offers a Few Words on the Death of Dr. Alfred Bell

I received a message yesterday morning from my friend Steve, telling me that his father Dr. Alfred Bell was soon to die. Two to five days was what they'd been told, but by the time I returned Steve's call a few hours later his dad had already died.

It wasn't unexpected, as Alf had wrestled his way through a bout of cancer a few years ago, and then this past winter had been diagnosed with an aggressive and inoperable brain tumour. He was remarkably at peace with it all, having told me during that earlier round of cancer treatment that he was quite ready to die. "I've lived a good long life, and have asked much of this old body of mine," he said to me from his hospital bed, his great smile creasing his face. "I trust Jesus with what comes next."

Still, it is never easy to mark the end of a life and bid farewell to such a person as this. As a Baptist pastor, long-time prison chaplain, teacher, conference speaker, and thoughtful pastoral guide, he touched many lives, mine most definitely among them. That day three summers ago when I went to see him in the hospital and bring a bit of comfort and prayer, he sat up in his bed and ministered to me, offering words of insight that at that moment I desperately needed to hear. Not that he didn't want my prayers, mind you, or that he couldn't be on the receiving end of pastoral care, but somehow in even his most vulnerable and painful moments he could still speak to the needs of others.

The greatest gift Alf offered me was to act as a support to me during a very difficult patch in my life and ministry some twenty years ago. We met every month or two over the course of a year, and his wisdom became a sort of anchor for me, as I made my way through a crisis that had deeply wounded my parish at the time. I wrote about one particularly significant conversation Alf and I shared, for the book Steve and I co-wrote a few years back, I Will Not Be Shaken: A Songwriter's Journey Through the Psalms. The short version of that chapter is that Alf took me into the 23rd Psalm in a way that still has me shaking my head. Take a look at the PDF version of the chapter - Shepherd of Life - and you'll get a sense of the deep and gentle wisdom of the man. I'll miss him.

Rest eternal grant to him, O Lord.
And let light perpetual shine upon him.
May his soul, and the souls of all the departed,
through the mercy of God, rest in peace and rise in glory.
Amen.